Train

We decided to take the train from Chiang Mai to the south islands in Thailand because the bus is horrible and flying was too expensive. We learned at the last minute though, that if you book a flight about a month in advance, they are as cheap as $40. Over the next few days, that very low number tortured me – the train is hell.

We booked a 2^nd class sleeper car with fan. Air conditioning is available for a bit more but I had read countless posts online that said those cars get frigid cold and are not worth the extra money. Since B is already a cold blooded being, I knew she would have being freezing. This was a huge mistake. I think our train was from 1942. It felt like we were being transported to war. The entire thing was mint green inside, the fan was at least as old as the train, it was boiling hot. The toilets were metal squaty-potties that were basically holes going directly onto the tracks, the sinks were.... here, just look at the photos. There are just no words to describe it:

About an hour into our journey, we made a usual stop at another train station but this time we didn’t get going again right away. Seeing as no one speaks English, it was difficult but we finally found out that a train was derailed in front of us and that we may be there for, “an hour, two hours, four hours, I don’t know!” Thankfully, the train station we stopped at was very clean and just outside was a great market with fresh food. We got the best spring rolls on the planet for 5 baht each (that’s like, 16 cents.) We got back on the train after about 45 minutes which was pure luck because every announcement is made in Thai only. We happened to be sitting by a 6 year old boy with Down Syndrome and his mother. They were Thai but his Mom spoke some English and was able to translate all the announcements for us. In exchange, we saw her son nude at many times during the next 19 hours. You have to take the good with the bad, right?

I personally found the motion of the train somewhat soothing... the noise another thing though and the train constantly stopping is confusing in the dead of the night. B can sleep on ANYTHING but that first night was the worst sleep of her life. She said she kept waking up when the train would stop, thinking we were at our stop. Since she had no window and the lights were on the entire time, it is impossible to gauge what time it is.

My main issue was the heat – stifling. The window couldn’t be open at night because water would get in and with the curtains closed for blocking out the light and peeping toms, you couldn’t get any of the fan blowing at you. It was brutal.

When we got to Bangkok, we craved western civilization like nothing before. We went straight to the most western mall we could find and ate a bagel. Then ice cream. Then for dinner I had a pizza and B had spaghetti. It was our first time breaking down and eating something other than rice. I think making it a week isn’t so bad! We had to spend the day living like kings in that luxury mall because at 7pm, we had to board another 12 hour train ride from Bangkok to Surat Thani. After that, an hour bus ride to the ferry terminal. Then a 2 hour ferry ride to Koh Samui. Then 40 minute taxi ride to our hotel. After that many hours of travel, there better be something amazing on the other end and we were not disappointed when we stopped into a tropical paradise.

But first... I didn’t think it was possible for a train to be worse than the first train we were on. Guess what? It was! The seats were smaller and no one spoke any English. No one. We put our own beds back into seats because no one would do it for us. This takes a magic hand obviously because they were 100% not put back together right as now our knees touched each others when before there was a good solid 5 inches between us. There was gushing water at one point near the sinks. Literally gushing. I don’t know how that ended because we just ran back to our seats and used baby wipes to cleanse our bodies instead.

The real icing on the cake was the cock roaches. There was a Thai guy in the seat next to us and he found a sandal to kill them all with. We sat with our feet up anyway.

B went into the 2^nd class with A/C car and said it was like a different world. They had tables, and electric plugs, and people were watching their laptops, playing cards and all in a perfectly comfortable temperature. I will never ever take 2^nd class fan again. I’d love to take a train in North America to see the wild difference. Like I said though, you have to take the good with the bad and here we are!

S.