Bus to Chiang Mai

Last night was one of those nights that you wish you could erase from your memory. We boarded what we were told was a VIP FIRST CLASS bus but was actually just a glorified double decker transit bus with some dress up.

Let me tell you, the road to Chiang Mai is paved with hatred and fury. 10 hours of horror! What a terrible sleep – it felt like we were fighting our way through the elements when I woke up at some undetermined time to thunder and lightning. The suspension of that bad boy left me with aches and pains today. My body is starting to punish me for punishing it with a lack of sleep and I am feeling worse for wear. In addition to that, this sleeper bus started with a movie, dubbed in thai, at high volume and all the lights on.

Before the bus even started moving though, B had to use the bathroom. She came back to our seat in complete shock. It was the worst bathroom she has ever been in. She described it as entirely stainless steel but rusted and dripping wet. The toilet was a metal bowl no larger than the palms of her hands with a bucket of water beside it which also held a ladle. It wasn’t until later that we figured out the use for such tools.

The fine folks on the bus were kind enough to provide us with a delicious and nutritious meal though:

Yup, the mystery drink and custard filled bun stayed in that package. We were on a very strict liquid limit for the next ten hours so sampling that was not on the agenda.

Now... the real thing I’ve been waiting to tell you, dying to tell you, is that when we stopped at 1am in the morning at a rest station we simply HAD to use the bathroom. There was no avoiding it. People, I peed into this last night:

I’m serious. The scoop is for putting water into the “toilet” after you go in it. Somehow it washes it away. Needless to say, THIS is the worst bathroom I’ve ever been in. Welcome to Thailand!

It wasn’t all bad though, I did see these adorable little kitties. I’m not allowed to touch any stray animals because I’ll probably get some sort of parasite and spend the next 25 days in a hospital but it is damn tempting.

Today has been a chill day exploring Chiang Mai by foot. We went for a Thai massage (one hour for 7$) and had some delicious lunch. I have settled on fried rice and chicken for now and it cost me $1.60 for a plate of it today! The massage was quite painful to be honest. They do a lot of contorting and a lot of sitting on you. I did feel good afterwards and I kept telling myself, “She is a trained professional” but really, this is Thailand after all. The prices are so ridiculous here that I fear I will be the most frugal person in the world when I get back.

We are off to the night market tonight and something very exciting but secret for tomorrow!

S.

Bangkok!

Yesterday was such a whirlwind that we’ve spent today in a lazy stupor watching movies in our hostel and staying out of the rain. We headed to Hua Lamphong train station in search of some breakfast. Luckily we found a fruit stand where we got a bag of pineapple and a bag of watermelon for a whopping 25 baht – that is just under a dollar! We topped that off with an apple filled pastry and we were good to go.

In order to truly get the feel of any city, I suggest you try out public transit. This was one of our most memorable moments of our trip to Mexico and Bangkok proved no different. I’ve now decided that we can’t go to a country and not try their bus system. This system was slightly more organized that the bus stops in Mexico but they generally expect you to get on whilst it is still in motion – something that I was not privy to. If you ever find yourself in a Thai bus, don’t give the money to the driver, he does not speak English and he does not want to talk to you. Another person will come to collect your fare. Hopping on a bus is the epitome of throwing caution to the wind. You need to rely on locals to get you where you need to go. Luckily after obliterating several language barriers, “go this way, then this way” with various hand motions, we unexpectedly arrived at a boat. Why not? Let’s hop on.

Our final destination was the Siriraj Medical Museum. If you’ve watched season two ofAn Idiot Abroad, you will remember this from the Thailand episode. This is a quite gruesome museum lacking the quality of body preservation that we have come to expect in North America. There was a lot of formaldehyde in that room. We saw about 50 conjoined twins with various connecting points. Babies in jars . Seriously. Unfortunately no photos were allowed but we did snag one of this lovely man... woman? split in half.

After that it was off to SWENSENS! Ok, so this isn’t even remotely Thai, it is an American chain but how can we say no to delicious ice cream sundaes? Good to see that the dead babies didn’t kill our appetites.

See that rose? This is a classy establishment.

We took the boat back to... wherever we took the boat from, and grabbed a taxi to Siam Mall where Siam Ocean World is. It is Southeast Asia’s largest aquarium and it was VERY impressive. It is an expensive tourist attraction by Bangkok standards at $36 but well worth the money. This was far bigger than the Vancouver Aquarium and had far more to see, including several activities like the “Happy Fish Happy Feet” foot bath – get your dead foot skin eaten off by little fish! It mostly tickled but that didn’t stop B from squealing like a stuck pig. She was sitting by a 4 year old girl who was far more composed.

We spent several hours there then went to the food court for dinner. It was absolutely massive! There were at least 3 shops dedicated solely to breads. And I was worried about the lack of cake... my worries are gone! Cupcake shops galore! We bypassed the sweets and ate at a thai place. I got grilled chicken and rice – Hey, I’m taking it slow here. B got fried vegetables and rice which was “the spiciest thing I’ve ever eaten.” She couldn’t feel her mouth (hence the lack of cupcake desserts.)

We decided to take yet another form of transportation home – time for the Skytrain! The station was busier than Stadium station after a hockey game. I’m not sure if there was enough oxygen to keep all of us alive in there. We had to transfer to the underground Subway MRT. Are you counting? We took a city bus, boat, taxi, skytrain and subway all in one day. The Bangkok Skytrain/Subway system is VERY advanced compared to ours. It is amazing how parts of this city seem straight out of the third world and others are shockingly futuristic. The juxtaposition is strange to see.

We need these! Everyone forms perfect lines on either side while leaving a space for people to exit the trains first.

We were exhausted by the time we got home. The heat here takes a lot out of you and it is difficult to stay hydrated. Water is insanely cheap here – I’m currently drinking from a 1.5L bottle that I got for 50 cents!

We are headed to Chiang Mai tonight via bus. We tried to book a train ticket but they have to be booked many days in advance in order to get a sleeper car. We get in tomorrow morning (Jan 26^th) and are staying there for a week. This is where the real adventure happens... we have some incredible things planned for this week.

Dinner time!

S.

Planning Polly

Well it is 6am in not-so-sunny Bangkok. Turns out the sun doesn’t come for another 40 minutes but we feel like we’ve stepped into a time loop. We got to our hostel at about 1am last night and went to bed at about 2am. That means we have had four hours of sleep but legitimately had to check three sources for time because it feels like we’ve been asleep for several days. Neither of us would be surprised if we had been sleeping until 6pm.

Now, where to start... Oh, I know – Just as we were leaving home, I got a call from my lovely cat-sitting pal informing me that I forgot my passport on her table. Yup. As B likes to say, over and over, “Planning Polly forgot her passport!” She sure did. But not just once folks, I also forgot it in the bathroom at the Vancouver airport. At that moment, B decided she had to hold onto our most important items and I was deemed barely fit for travel. This is why we make such a great team. B is utterly useless in the planning of anything and apparently I am utterly useless at putting anything into action.

We passed through customs just fine but B insisted, quite loudly, that she would like one of those famed body scans. By the grace of the gods, she was randomly selected. I wanted to take a picture but sadly those aren’t allowed when they’re violating your rights.

Onto Japan Airlines – I love this airline and I love Japanese people! We had two legs of the flight and the planes were different (one was older) but the first plane was SUPER AWESOME FUN TIME! It had a sweet remote that popped out and turned into a video game controller. There were tons of new movies to watch including Footloose (my movie of choice,) What’s Your Number, and Dolphin Tale (B’s choice.) Yes, they were terrible.

The airline though, is extremely accommodating and apparently has free booze the whole flight. We took to hoarding bottles of water instead because the air was so dry. There was literally nothing to eat in the Tokyo Narita airport though. This airport was also pretty disappointing, it was very grey and deserted and the surrounding seemed like farmland. Not what we expected flying into Tokyo. There is more than one airport in Japan though so maybe the others are a little more exciting. As for the food on the actual plane, I will do a post with that shortly!

Oh, I can’t forget to show you the first of the “Japanese Style Toilets” we saw. They give you so many options in the bathrooms in Japan... western, western with bidet, and this hole in the ground:

When we finally arrived in Bangkok, I was surprised to see how busy the airport was at 11pm. Tokyo was dead at 5pm but Bangkok was all lights and bustle. We are staying at Hua Lumphong hostel which is directly across from the train station. We thought we could get a jump on things and book our train tickets when we arrived, so we got out cabbie to drop us off there – no dice as it was closed. You wouldn’t know it though because there were several hundred people sleeping on bare tile. This meant we had to get back across the street to our hostel. Oh don’t worry, only 8 lanes of traffic to get through but there is a cross walk painted on the road! No flashing hand or walk symbol meant playing Frogger and hoping not to get squished while carrying 22 lbs on my back (yup, we weighed them at the airport!)

I also saw my first stray cat! She was pregnant and had a heart shaped marking on the side of her belly. I probably would have taken a picture of her if it didn’t smell like animal feces everywhere... and if it wasn’t 1am... and if people weren’t lying on the streets randomly massaging each other’s feet.

Our hostel is over all pretty good. We got the A/C going and I’m a little frightened about stepping out into that hot humid air. It was 26C when we arrived but bear in mind that was only in the middle of the night. B’s hair is telling us the humidity index with the rate it is growing. We have two little beds, a tiny shower and toilet but I feel this is pretty high class compared to what some more budget travelers are dealing with. And free wi-fi!

We are off to explore now, after eating our last of the Tim Horton’s we loaded up on for the flight. And now my white rice diet begins...

S.